I’m not a huge fan of the word “no”. I don’t like to hear it and even more importantly I don’t like to say it. Because of my aversion to using “the word” I tend to use everything but “no”: yes, maybe, we’ll see, who knows, there’s an idea or I just all together ignore the question, statement or cirsumstance.
Recently someone asked if I could be a part of an event coming up. To not offend them and to avoid me having to say the tough thing, (that my schedule didn’t allow this event to be a priority) I said “yes”. I didn’t want to say “no” because I felt that meant potential conflict or they’ think I didn’t care. But, here’s the ripple effect of that “yes”: more stress in a schedule that already has little margin, less focus on what I should be really doing, robbing more time from family, and lastly when I’m there resenting the fact that I’m do this at all.
When I avoid saying “no” when it’s called for I make myself out to be a liar because I’m saying “yes”, when inside I’m screaming “no”. When we placate people by putting them off and avoiding them, we let the issue become a wedge in our relationships and we frustrate others that would love a straight answer. We need to be asking ourselves the motivation behind this: Is it my own insecurity? Am I intimidated by the person? Am I afraid of conflict?
Bottom Line: You can say no. Life will not blow up. Life moves on as will your relationships.
Say it with me……..No.
Your Turn! What area of your life do you have a hard time saying no? Share below.